This is my first post in this blog...
well, I would normally talk about my life and some of my secrets(if you still consider them as secrets)
When Carmen told me what he said to me, everything around me is like...blank. Empty. I couldn't think of anything else except the sentence that hurt my heart like my heart was stabbed with a dagger. Very Hard. Nothing can stop the pain. Then, the tears flow automatically. Why do you have to hurt me over and over again? It seems like you've changed. It's like I don't know you anymore.
Why??? Did I do anything wrong?
i m stupid says:
u dunnu?nvm,just ask her dun disturb me
I hate to hear this sentence. It hurts a LOT!!! What did I do wrong? Is liking someone an offence? If you don't like it then say so. Why did you change? I cried this morning and the day you told me(not directly though) which is yesterday. On the Christmas Day. My worst Christmas ever.
Remind me not to go online every 1st of March and 25th of December. I will have a hard time to move on. It's difficult. Should I delete everything that got to do with him? Friendster? MSN? It's difficult. I wonder how long this pain will continue. Will it go away? I always hope for something different but...
I really wish to get coma that night so that I can calm myself and have some peace for awhile. Maybe suffer from amnesia. Then, I wouldn't have to remember all the pain that cause my heart to break again and again. I've thought of consulting a REAL psychologist but all I could do is only cry in front of the doctor. The first thing that comes to my mind when I read that sentence is like...suicide...
WHY?WHY?WHY? The two person that I thought I will be together forever just left me. Alone in the darkness. The pain is unbearable. Is there anyway to forget someone easily? I feel like forgetting him but in the same time, I don't feel like it. I'm so confused.
Is life that difficult?
